Q U O T E #5

in the face of change what mask do you where? the really tough one Bane from Batman wears? the sleek black and white one from Black Swan? a clown nose with a huge panted smile? i have no idea what face to put on, if i should laugh or cry, jump for joy or snuggle up and wait until the change is passed. 

living in a comfortable place where things rarely change i have grown to assume i am always accepting of change. but i am finding that dropping what i know and being open to whatever happens is much more than just words. change is beautiful, it allows you more room to grow. it gives you new experiences to learn from and teaches you difficult lessons along the way. these are things i know, things that i say all the time. now i am realizing that i also have to tell myself i can not control the future, i don't have the time traveling mask. all i have is my regular old face, a little make up but no mask.

so in the face of change i choose to say hello, welcome to my very simply life. i am ready for a new adventure, i know that what you have in store for me is what is meant to be!

  

Q U O T E #4

i read a quote today: 

we live in a world where we are taught to dream big, never give up and that we can have everything we want in we try hard enough. somewhere along the line i think the meaning of the beautiful message of dreaming big was lost or translated wrong or who knows what the heck happened, but all of a sudden dreaming big means having the next best thing. being better than the person to your right. taking crazy risks. spending more money. having more money. being seen. being known. basically having bragging rights to everything and using them always. 

the lady i want to be isn't the lady who has to keep up with the Joneses-or Kardashians (even if i watch that show shamelessly). i want to be the lady who is superior to her former self. at any moment you can lose everything that gives you bragging rights. you can lose your family, job, friends, watches, cars, money, home, EVERYTHING. when it's all gone, and you have nothing to prove that you were once "superior" will you be happy with the person you are left with? yourself. will you think you gave as much as you could, loved as hard as you could, laughed as loud as you could and grew into the person you dreamed you would be? if so then i am doing it wrong because i am not keeping up with the Joneses as much as the next guy. 

i am working on myself. always choosing to look at life with a positive outlook. always choosing a smile over an eye roll. always choosing a laugh over a frustrated grunt. i am learning to put others first but care for myself too. i am learning to take life less seriously. i am learning to be balanced. i am not perfect. i keep buying expensive yoga clothes because somehow they make my yoga better. i keep thinking new things in my apartment will make it more cozy. i am only human, i mean like to shop. but working on me means i get to be ok with the fact that i don't have to be superior to the dude to my right. i can be happy with what i have and know that if i no longer have the "stuff" i will still be happy with what is left, myself. 

Q U O T E #3

i may admit something embarrassing in the next few paragraphs...

i am a amateur hoarder. truth. i recently cleaned out my parents attic (which was 3/4 full of my crap). i threw away 4 boxes of trash, sold 4 boxes of treasures, and kept 4 boxes of memories. after all 6 hours working in 80 degree confined spaces and getting 4 or 5 minor cuts/bruises, i still struggled to toss a box of old middle school/high school notes(in fact i might be under my bed right now... but, hey! i never claimed perfection:). EMBARRASSING CENTRAL!   you would think i'd learn my lesson. 

the reason i am sharing all that "crap" is to say that i think the lesson here for me to learn isn't that saving memories is bad. It's more that collecting moments can mean more than saving a note box. yes things can be tied to memories but when the things are shoved in boxes below boxes of cd cases from the 90's you tend to forget the memory anyways. 

when i sifted through the boxes i felt waves of emotions i am not sure i really wanted or needed to dig up. i started to think that maybe those memories weren't memories i needed to hold on to so tightly. maybe the memories i need to hold on to are those images, that play like movie clips in my head, of me snuggled next to my grandpa, watching Animal Planet, and holding his frail hand, weeks before he died. Or those nights driving home from karate (yes...karate...) with my dad, windows down on a summer night listening to songs from the Goo Goo Dolls and Semisonic. think back, what is your first memory? i bet, if you can remember it, it had some sort of impact on your life. i also bet, if you are anything like me, you don't really even remember what you have saved in that old box of scrapbooking stuff you bought in high school and used only a handful of times. 

don't get me wrong, i mean, i do still have 4 boxes of "things" i call memories in the attic. baby books and pictures, dress up clothes and yearbooks, who knows! but i am realizing that time with people i love, and conversations with people i've never met impact my life more deeply than a tiny picture frame someone gave me when i turned 16(a million years ago). sometimes that stuff clouds the way and makes life complicated. my new plan in my life is to learn to simplify a little. to look at what is really meaningful and hold tightly to that because those are experiences that can help guide me through tough times, a box of memories that is hiding can't...

if you have sometime today, dust off the cobwebs in you memory storage, and smile at the things your brain held on too.

quote #2

its no secret to the people around me, i am a serious lover of yoga! there are moments in practice when i feel like i can no longer stand but there is nothing more rewarding for me than being able to push myself through the shakes and find strength.  i have been thinking a lot lately about being in warrior pose.  for those who don't know what warrior pose looks like, you must google it if you plan on understanding any of what i am about to say :)  yogis say that when you are in warrior it is important to have your arm balanced in the middle. if you reach forward you are reaching into the future, if you reach backwards you are reaching into the past. when you find balance in the middle you are living in the present. 

I found a quote...

i really liked this, because it helps me remember that living in the present is the only way i can remain balanced.  i don't find myself dwelling in the past but more fully focused on the future.  i always want to solve problems before they even happen.  like in warrior pose, a strong warrior waits in the present and is prepared for what ever is to come.  it is important to face the future but to do so with strength.  when i reach too far forward it doesn't take much to knock me out of balance. i want to be a strong warrior who looks to the future with strength and bravery. 

as spring blossoms don't forget to live in the present and find joy in the little things.

  

q u o t e #1

have you been on pinterest lately? it is packed full of quotes and i am willing to admit...i am guilty of repining a good chunk of those. each one is designed to inspire and encourage it's readers. but reading quotes doesn't automatically make you live a happy, perfect life.  words are just words, they are empty and meaningless with out actions.  it is actions that inspire quotes, not words.  as the new year approaches i want to push myself to create actions out of inspiring words...  

i have decided to be a person who continues to make positive changes to become the person i want to be.